D A N
by The Gone Angel
Summary: DAN equals Dan And Natalie, doesn't it? Drabbles from hate, to hate-crush, to hate-love, to love, to married couple with children. /Acting: "Dan...are you okay?" "Yeah...I'm totally fine...Tota- ALERT! ALERT!"/ Pairings: Amian and Natan
1. Barbies

Disclaimer: I don't own 39 Clues.

**Dedicated to all Natan fans and fangirls.**

**39 drabbles leading to the bonding love of Natan, starting with hate, hate-crush, hate-love, love, and getting married. :/**

* * *

"Why is she stalking me? W-ahhh!"

"DANIEL, I WAS NOT STALKING YOU!"

"That hurt!"

"I hope you enjoyed your pain, peasant."

"But why were you stalking me?"

Sigh.

"I wasn't, Daniel. I was simply planning ways to murder you and your dog, Duffy."

"Ha ha ha, very funny, Nat," Dan said sarcastically. "And the circus clowns are shutting down Gucci."

"What?!"

"I was just kidding, Nat the Cat."

"Shut up, or I'll take a picture of you playing with barbies from the attic."

"I do not! Ninjas never play with barbies!"

"Then they were Bratz."

"..."

"I knew it!"

"...You're a pain in the butt."

"..."

"What now, Cobra?"

"Do I look like a butt?"

"Yes, and you smell like one too! Hey, I rhymed!"

"DANIEL ARTHUR CAHILL!"

"...How do you know my full name?"

"I have my ways, Daniel."

"It's DAN! D for Daring, A for Awesome, and N for Ninja!"

Snort.

"Yeah right. It's more of a opinion than a statement."

"..."

"Bye, I need to stop Ian from flirting."

"I need to get Amy away from the vileness of Ian Cobra."

"IT'S KABRA!"

"..."

* * *

Do you see **why **Natan is such a **GREAT AWESOME **couple?


	2. Pigface

**Disclaimer: I don't own 39 Clues.**

**Replies:**

**xxXNatan fanXxx: :D The Dan-rhyming-failing or the fact that Natan is FTW?  
**

**Eternal Huntress of the Night: Your welcome. I've been a big fan of the Kabras X Cahills (aka Amian, Natan, HopexVikram, and IsabelxArthur)  
**

**Volcanic Lily: OHMYGOSH, YOU REVIEWED THIS! I'm. Going. To. Die! /faints but slaps myself/ I need to be alive to write!  
**

**PearlAgent64: That's the point. He didn't rhyme.**

**eternalreader62: Thanks :)**

**THGFAN101: Thank you!**

* * *

"We meet again, peasant."

"Same thing, but without the word 'peasant'. It is replaced with Cobra."

"Daniel..."

"Should I duck? Hop? Die? Jump? Laugh? Scream-laugh? Scream-of-horror? Scream-"

"Shut UP!"

"Gosh, Cobra. Your voice is so annoying."

"Ugh. I'm going to find someone decent to chat with. Ta-ta, Daniel!"

"It's Dan, Cobra."

"..."

* * *

"What are you EATING?!"

"Ice cream, you idiot."

"I'm NOT AN IDIOT, YOU SICK GARAGE EATING PEASANT!"

"Calm down, Natalie," Ian soothed. "He's being a git."

"Isn't that, like, the same thing as idiot, Cobras?"

Ian glared, and said in a calm, yet scary voice,"It's British, so that's what makes it better."

Dan stuck out his tongue at them, which made ice cream drip down his chin. "Whatever you say, bossy brats."

"O-Oh my gosh, Dan! Show s-some manners!" Amy scolded, her stutter returning whenever she faced the victims of Dan's stupidity.

"Why are you standing up for them and not me?" whined Dan.

"Because we are better!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

Dan rolled his eyes. "Whatever, pigface."

Natalie screamed, and that was the worse thing Dan's poor ears had ever heard in his life.


	3. Donuts

**Disclaimer: I don't own 39 Clues.**

**Eternal Huntress of the Night: O.O You're not the only one...  
**

**Volcanic Lily: It IS a big deal. You're one of the best authors in the 39 Clues fandom!**

* * *

"WE ARE FARMERS, BUM DA BUM BUM."

"Ughhh, shut your trap, Daniel. I'm calling my boyfriend."

"In your dreams."

"What?"

"Natalie, I'm sorry to say this, but your boyfriend is a pillow."

"What?!"

"Alexander the Pillow."

"DANIEL, DON'T SAY ANOTHER WORD OUT OF YOUR NASTY MOUTH."

"NATALIE KISSES A PILLOW!"

"ARGGHHH! NO!"

Shoot. Dan fell, and you probably understand what happened.

* * *

"You almost killed me, Cobra! Just because of a stupid pillow!"

"Alexie isn't stupid! He's my boyfriend!"

"..."

"What now, Daniel?"

"You gave the pillow a nickname."

"So?"

"You're acting like a love-sick five year old girl."

"AH!"

Shoot again.

* * *

"Natalie," Ian warned. "I'm going to throw away your pillow if you don't stop trying to kill Daniel."

"Why are you taking _his _side?"

"Because for once, he is right. Get over the pillow. You're fourteen."

"Shut up, Ian-the-peasant-lover!"

"You're so going to die, Natalie!"

"AHHH! CRAZY LOVE-SICK BROTHER ON A RAMPAGE!"

* * *

"Ian shot me!" whined Natalie.

"For once, Nat-san, you know how _I _feel."

* * *

"Ian, I think your sister is spending to much time with my brother."

"Want to get revenge on them?"

"Sure, as long as donuts are involved."

"Donuts?"

"Ian, as a reminder, I'm Dan's sister. I know his ways."


	4. Love

**Disclaimer: I don't own 39 Clues, I cry by Flo Rida, I can only imagine by David Guetta ft Chris Brown and Lil' Wayne, Gangnam Style by PSY, and Your Body by Christina Aguilera.**

**priceless xpressions: I was hungry then too. Thanks for the review!**

**Guest: Dan is pretty epic, isn't he?**

**eternalreader62: I'm keeping you all in suspense...XD  
**

**xXxGoldenwingxXx: Hey, Golden! Yes, you get credit for Pigface xD I never knew you read 39 Clues...*reads later comment* Oh...Okay, to fill you in, Dan's the prankster, Amy and Ian have chemistry in the beginning books, but Amy's crush on him wears off a bit. Dan and Natalie hate each other, and is probably never going to happen, but a fangirl can dream, right? Amy is Dan's older sister, and Ian is Natalie's older brother. AMIAN AND NATAN FOR DA WIN!**

**Volcanic Lily: Yeah; Basically, the whole fandom of awesome authors left. The remaining are you and JesseCPK. The rest (Sanity, Snow, Alex, and blah blah blah) DISAPPEARED. I can prove thepowersss the best. Chocolates too. Thanks for finding that chapter hilarious. Right now, even _I'm _wondering what they're going to do, and _I'm _the author!**

* * *

"I cry, just a little-"

"Emo much, Daniel?" Natalie replied, her lips lifted into a smirk.

"Dude, it's like, Flo Rida. Not that you know his music."

"I don't."

"Gasp!"

"What now?"

"He's like, an awesome rapper dude!"

"Whatever."

* * *

"Oppa gangnam style!" shouted Dan, doing a weird dance.

"May I ask why your dancing with a Christina Aguilera poster?"

"Uhh...you didn't see anything!"

Natalie snapped a picture. "Thanks, love."

As she ran out the door, she heard Dan say,

"Ewww! British language!" and chase after her.

* * *

"That I want something from you! Yeah!" sung Dan at Saladin.

"_Mrrp?" _asked Saladin.

"He's asking 'what, git?'"

Dan gasped. "NO!"

"Yes."

"I'm crying mentally."

"I'm face-palming. _Mentally."_

"I'm dying. _Mentally."_

They glared, but yet smiled.

* * *

"All I wanna doooo...is looove your body," sung Natalie, her British accent messing the whole song up.

Dan raised his eyebrows. "Really?"

"EWWW! STALKER!"

Dan ran off.

* * *

"Tie the donut to the string, Ian."

"But why, love?"

"DON'T CALL ME LOVE! Oh, because Dan will run after it like a puppy. Ha!"

"Isn't this trick for animals, love?"

"You're saying Dan's _not _an animal?"

"Good point, love."

"Don't call me love."

"Sure, honey."

"I'm going to kill you. You better run, sweetheart."

"And I thought I was the one calling names," murmured Ian, before running away from Amy's string.

To gag him with, of course. A pitiful string wasn't scaring him.

It was Amy.


	5. Vesper

**Disclaimer: I don't own 39 Clues.**

**Volcanic Lily: Thanks again for finding it hilarious. I let the characters take over the fanfiction, I'm just the one typing it. I can feel what they're doing. ****Anyways, try to imagine Ian and Amy sitting next to each other, and their backs are turned away. They both are holding the same piece of long string, and are tying the donut to the string, and around them is different stuff, like duck tape and a bunch of stuff for the trap (I can't say anymore) And above them in a bubble is Dan dancing with a Christina poster, and Natalie smirking, and asking, "May I ask why your dancing with a Christina Aguilera poster?" and Dan is blushing, and singing Gangnam Style. Isn't it adorable? Too bad I suck at drawing, or I would have made it and posted it on devianart.**  


**xxXNatan fanXxx: Oh, that! Yes, yes they are. ****Anyways, try to imagine Ian and Amy sitting next to each other, and their backs are turned away. They both are holding the same piece of long string, and are tying the donut to the string, and around them is different stuff, like duck tape and a bunch of stuff for the trap (I can't say anymore) And above them in a bubble is Dan dancing with a Christina poster, and Natalie smirking, and asking, "May I ask why your dancing with a Christina Aguilera poster?" Dan is blushing, and singing Gangnam Style. Isn't it adorable? Too bad I suck at drawing, or I would have made it and posted it on devianart.**

* * *

After the scene before, Amy calmed down. "Whatcha doing?"

"Making the trap, what else?"

"Making the donuts. I put you on donut duty, Ian!"

"I'm _not _cooking those sweet, idiotic American garbage they call-"

"Don't forget _I'm_ American. "

He smirked. "So? I'm British."

"Does that mean anything?" sighed Amy.

"Yes, love. Yes it does."

"And don't try and change the subject with me, mister!" Then she uttered, "Cobra."

Ian opened his mouth to protest, but Amy whacked him on the head with the duck tape roll.

"And _that's _for calling Americans' idiotic!"

* * *

"Still wanna-"

"No."

"You even said-"

"No."

"But you even sung-"

"No."

"You are so-"

"No. Shut up, Daniel."

"Make me."

"..."

* * *

**...One Second Later...**

****"OW! NATALIE BIT MY HAND!"

"Vampire power!" she yelled. "All hail Robert Patterson!"

"Ew, the sparkling baby-powdered 100 year old stalker..."

"YOU TAKE THAT BACK, DANIEL!"

"Ow! I didn't even _have time _to take it back!"

"So you will?"

"Nope."

"ARGGHH!"

* * *

Ian heard a scream. "Love, did someone wake up Nellie early?"

"No, why?"

"Because someone just screamed."

"..."

"..."

"Vesper!"

"Vesper!"

"Jinx!"

Ian sighed. "Your brother is rubbing off on you."

"Ewwww."

"Love, why do you have to make me think of a gross version of what I just said?"

Amy shuddered. "It was already gross."


	6. Jacob

**Disclaimer: I don't own 39 Clues.**

**MrsJoshHutcherson112: Thanks for reviewing! I know, right? NOBODY FORGOT HALLOWEEN! DX Bozos...I was hoping to yell that at them!  
**

**CelestialBronzeLightning: XD Natalie's boyfriend will soon _not _be a pillow. And thank you!  
**

**Volcanic Lily: I know. I had it stuck in my mind ALL DAY LONG. Yeah, that's the reason I wrote it. Twilight...sucks...O.O  
**

* * *

****"My hand hurts."

"Too bad, Dan. You were asking for it. What _did _you do anyways?"

"Dissing Twilight."

"YOU DIDN'T!"

"yeah, I kinda did."

"Who _did _you diss?"

"Edward."

"Good."

"Why?"

"I'm Team Jacob."

"Oh, come on!" complained Dan. "The only reason you like him is because he reminds you of Ian Cobra!"

* * *

"AHHHHHHHHHH!"

"Where's that scream?"

"I don't know."

"Anyways, Natalie, I think-"

"AHHHHHH!"

Dan came crashing into the room with Amy chasing him. "Get back here, you dweeb!"

Dan hid behind Natalie. "I surrender!"

"What made Amy this mad?" asked Natalie.

"I said Jacob was like Ian."

"He is not!" proclaimed both girls'.

"IN YOUR DREAMS!" shouted Dan, sticking out his tongue and running away.

"Don't go running after him, love."

Natalie smirked. "I'll leave you guys alone."

She slowly backed out of the room, and then flew past Dan, yelling, "I'll be first to the kitchen!"

"Nun uh!"


	7. Magic

**Disclaimer: I don't own 39 Clues.**

**Tomorrow, I'll update A Annoying Fairytale, Clue, Awkward Love, and As a Child.**

**MrsJoshHutcherson112: XD Yush, I'm glad you realized the horrors of it. I chuckled at your review. In computer class, huh? Our school doesn't allow different websites, like FFN or FP.  
**

**Volcanic Lily: Amy was one of them...she was...O.O I know, I'm getting a lot of mental images too.**

**Glowgatch67: Aw, thank you! Your review meant a lot to me.  
**

**xxXNatan fanXxx: I wish I could see Dan in person. I'd say, "Hey, Dan-san. Wanna prank someone?"**

* * *

"So, Nat-san, will you try this?"

"Nope."

"Please?"

"No."

"Please?!"

"Nope, Dan. Sorry. NOT."

"I can't believe you hate Sour Patch Kids!"

"I can believe it."

Dan rolled his eyes.

* * *

"Here, the last part of hell-I mean, unicorns and that kind of stuff."

Amy rolled her eyes. "It's supposed to be magic, not tragic."

"Whatever, love."

"Friendship is magic, Ian."

"Are you watching My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic with my sister?"

"Um...maybe?"

Ian sighed. "I thought you had more sense."

* * *

Dan almost spit out his sour patch kid. "WHAT?!"

"Yes, peasant-boy, I got a boyfriend. Are you surprised?"

"Yeah...kinda."

Natalie scowled.

"Wait a second, are you dating your new pillow pet unicorn?"

"..."

"I knew it!"

"Fine, I am."

"Not everything has to be based off My Little Pony."

"..."

"Wait-NO!"

Dan got pushed off his chair, and hit the floor. Hard, I might add.


	8. Incest

**Disclaimer: I don't own 39 Clues. Period.**

**BlueSakuraKyuubi: YOU DON'T LIKE SOUR PATCH KIDS!? Gone, calm yourself...*forces smile* I'm...er, fin. No, I mean, fine...yeah...thanks for reviewing.**

**eternalreader62: You just noticed? Sorry, I had to say that. Lol.**

**nellieawesomegomez: HEY! Flo Rida is my role model! *people stare* Er, sorry, I mean, I love his music...but I prefer calling Christina or Britney rolemodels. Rita Ora too. She's epical.  
**

**Volcanic Lily: Nat-san is Dan's 'ninja name for her.' You're half asleep during randomness? GASP! JK.  
**

**MrsJoshHutcherson112: NO! But my sister watches it...so while is was during homework, I found myself watching an episode. It made me hate it more. :/ Well, it depends...Pinkie Pie _is _funneh, but her song hurt my no-innocence-allowed ears. Friendship is magic, huh? NOT. Sadly, Pershing blocks EVERYTHING but coolmath or some writing stuff. At least I have poptropica. :)**

**foodluver: Thank you! :)**

* * *

"Hey, Cobra."

"Hello, Daniel."

"Have you ever wondered why Lucian has IAN in it?"

"...I never noticed that."

"Of course you didn't."

"What does _that _mean?!"

"That you're a evil stupid boy."

"DANIEL! SHUT THE-"

"Bleeeeeeeep."

"DON'T YOU DARE BLEEP ME OUT, YOU LITTLE PIECE OF-"

"Bleeeep."

"YOU LITTLE-"

"Bleep."

"SON OF A-"

"Bleep."

"SHUT UP, YOU-"

"Bleep."

"I WAS JUST GOING TO SAY-"

"Bleeeeeeeeep."

Ian sighed. "That you are so-"

"Bleeeeeep."

"GOD-"

"Bleeep."

"WHY ME?"

"Heehee," snickered Dan.

* * *

"Natalie!"

"What, brother dear?"

"Please talk to your boyfriend about this 'bleep' noise."

"Yes, brother dear. I'll talk to my boyfriend about-WAIT, WHAT?"

Ian couldn't help but burst out laughing. She didn't even see his easy trap set!

"YOU LITTLE-"

"Bleep."

"IAN, STOP USING THAT-"

"Bleep."

"IAN, YOU-"

"Bleep," muttered Ian, mouth twisted into a smirk. Maybe Daniel can help with _some _problems.

* * *

****"You **CUSSED **at my brother?!" shrieked Amy.

"He beeped me out."

"SO?"

"Yes, love?"

"Whacked IN THE FACE BY A GIRL!" shouted Dan.

"Daniel," said Natalie, winking. "Work on your pick up lines."

"Wait-"

"What?" finished Ian.

"..." It sunk in.

"THIS ISN'T INCEST!" chorused Amy and Dan.

Natalie howled with laughter as Amy and Dan chased after her.

* * *

**Enjoy,**

**Gone**


	9. Revenge

**Disclaimer: I don't own 39 Clues. **

**nellieawesomegomez: -.- He makes /_awesome_/ songs that are BETTER! XD Sorry, I'm a fan of his songs.**

**Volcanic Lily: I thought of his face like that too! Stupid boys...Soon, girls will win some more arguments. Later.**

**Eternal Huntress of the Night: XD Thanks. Are they IC? Please let them be...;o**

* * *

**This chapter is based off my one-shot Pale Fingers, so please check that out.**

* * *

"Natalie, you remind me of your great-great-grandmother sometimes," said Dan. "besides the fact she wanted to be a ninja."

Natalie stared. "How could you meet my great-great-grandmother?"

"Ghosts haunting Grace's mansion. Her name was Cat."

"Haha, Daniel. Very funny. And cute."

"I'm serious. Her brother was named Ian."

"So...why are you telling me this?"

"Because Cat rhymes with Nat."

Natalie slapped him.

* * *

"You remind me of your great-great-grandfather," murmured Amy, getting the trap perfect. Today was the day Dan would fall.

"What, love?"

"Ian, the name before yours."

"Okay."

"Do you even believe me?"

"..."

"I take that as a no."

"...Yes, I don't believe you."

"JERK!"

"I'm a jerk for not believing you?!"

"Exactly."

"You are too stubborn."

Amy grabbed one of the donuts and shoved it in his mouth. "Finally peace and quiet," she muttered.

"I wih get yuwo," spat Ian, chewing on the donut before swallowing.

Amy laughed. "Pink frosting suits you well, Ian."

Ian felt himself blush. "That's your fault!"

"Shove it."

He grabbed a donut and shoved it in her mouth. He smiled, replying, "Revenge."

"You are gonna get it!"

* * *

Dan and Natalie heard laughing.

"shhh, Daniel," whispered Natalie.

Dan rolled his eyes. "It's just Ian and Amy. Wait, WHAT?!"

Natalie smiled, despite herself. "They're having a food war."

"DONUTS? THEY ARE NOT INVITING ME?"

"No wonder," muttered Natalie.

* * *

Amy heard Dan, and set the trap.

Dan marched in, and saw the donuts. "DONUTS!"

Natalie followed behind.

_'This isn't the plan' _

_'I know, love, but it's more hilarious'_

_'You have a point'_

_'I always do'_

Dan fell to the ground, Natalie falling with him. The trap pulled them both to the ceiling.

Amy and Ian laughed.

"MY DONUTS!" screamed Dan.

"That's the least you're worried about, Daniel? WE ARE STUCK TOGETHER!"

"Oh. That."

"UGHH!"


	10. HATE!

**Disclaimer: I don't own 39 Clues. Or I Hate Boys by Christina Aguilera. My own spin off it.**

**Glowgatch67: Thank you. :)**

**Volcanic Lily: I was laughing while I wrote that scene too XD You're going to love what happens next. Another song.  
**

**Vesper One: Yep, I know :) It's called Unstoppable!**

**Mads-hatter-15: LOL, You're going to love what happens next, then.**

**nellieawesomegomez: Yes, you're correct.**

**readinfreak3546: I was random.**

**Guest: What's wrong with me? I don't know. Others ship it too. If you ship Deagan, then you suck in my book. :/**

**WARNING:**

**I'M OFFENDING BOYS IN THIS CHAPTER.**

* * *

"DANIEL, HAND ME THE KNIFE!"

"Wait a sec."

"What are you DOING?"

"Cutting the donut into a bagel, duh."

"You're a git."

"Thank you, Princess."

"You're not a Prince."

"Were you implying that we're married?"

"Big words for such a small brain."

"NATALIE COBRA!"

* * *

Once Ian and Amy let them off the ceiling, Natalie stormed to her room, and Amy followed.

"Sorry, Natalie. It was a prank."

Natalie grinned. "Look at this."

Amy saw the youtube link. "So?"

"Yes," Natalie said, with an evil smirk.

* * *

**...One Minute Later...**

_"No, no, no, I'm not bitter, I'm not mad."_

Dan and Ian listened. It was Natalie.

_"Well, maybe just a little, just a tad."_

_"I know every Cahill here ain't bad."_

_"But I found a worm."_

_"In every single one I saw."_

Ian looked outraged.

_"BOYS!"_

_"They're only good for fruit-I mean bananas!"_

"I'm offended, Ian."

"So am I, Daniel."

_"CAHILL BOYS!"_

Amy joins in.

_"Them Cahill boys are so nuts-they're driving me bananas!"_

_"OH CAHILL BOYS!"_

_"We should pack them up and ship em out."_

_"CAHILL BO-BO-BO BOYS!"_

_"CAHILL BO-BOYS!"_

_"I HATE THEM!"  
_

Dan rolled his eyes. "No you don't."

_"I hate Cahill boys but Cahill boys love me!" _sung Natalie.

Ian and Dan peeked in.

_"I think they suck; and my friends agree!" _sung Amy.

_"I hate Cahill boys but Cahill boys love me!"_

_"Eh yeah, eh yeah, eh yeah!"_

_"I HATE BOYS!"_

_"If you hate them boy Cahills; shake it!"_

_"We would all be happy; all be glad-"_

_"If sweet Isabel Kabra never had!"_

"It's about ME?"

"AND ME?" shouted Dan.

_"All these dirty little Cahill boys, who think that the Cahill girls-"_

_"Are only made for toys!"_

_"BOYS! Are so immature!"_

_"They rarely turn to men but then again men are all dogs!"_

"Offensive!" Dan said, quietly.

_"ALL MEN ARE DOGS!"_

"Don't remind me," Ian murmured sarcastically.

_"I hate Cahill boys but Cahill boys love ME!"_

_"I think they SUCK and my friends agree!"_

_"I hate Cahill boys but Cahill boys love me!"_

_"Eh yeah, eh yeah, eh yeah!"_

_"I HATE BOYS!"_

_"If you hate them Cahill boys; shake it!"_

_"LET'S GO!"_

"Oh no," muttered Dan.

_"CAHILL BOYS SUCK!"_

_"MAKE ME SICK!"_

_"INFLATED EGOS LIKE IAN'S!"_

"I hate you too, Amy," hissed Ian.

_"LITTLE ****s!"_

"Amy uses foul language?"

"No..."

_"USE THEM UP!"_

_"SPIT THEM OUT!"_

_"I H-A-T-E-"_

_"CAHILL BOOOOYS!"_

_"I hate Cahill boys but Cahill boys love me!"_

_"I THINK THEY SUCK AND MY FRIENDS AGREE!"_

_"I hate Cahill boys but Cahill boys love me!"_

_"Eh yeah, eh yeah, eh yeah."_

_"I HATE CAHILL BOOOOOOOOYS!"_

_"I hate Cahill boys but Cahill boys love me!"_

_"I THINK THEY SUCK AND MY FRIENDS AGREE, YEAH!"_

__Ian and Dan came out of their hiding spot.

"We hate you guys too," they both chorused.

Amy and Natalie blushed deep red.


	11. Knife

**Disclaimer: I don't own 39 Clues.**

**JesseCPK: Thank you for reviewing! I thought the song fit too! **

**Vesper One: It was hurtful, but it's a real song, so...who cares? Christina Aguilera described them well.**

**Mads-hatter-15: XD Did you get your paper finished? Anyways, thanks!**

**addicted2reading9: Thanks! **

**Bookworm54321: What? Aw? Were you 'awwing' at the song or the boys expressions?**

**Volcanic Lily: I'm glad I made everyone laugh...I just thought it was amusing. Apparently, everyone thought it was hilarious.**

**Jamyfrver: Thank you! I barely get complimented on my writing. Mostly complimented on humor.**

**readinfreak3546: It was weird? :P Then...no!**

* * *

"What movie are we going to watch?"

"Twilight."

"Are you serious?"

"Nope."

"AMY IS A ROMANTIC!" shouted Dan.

Natalie walked in. "Hello, Daniel. What's up?"

Dan stared at her. "You're not serious."

"What, Daniel?"

"You said, and I quote, 'what's up?' Don't you feel like saying something more...formal?"

Natalie shrugged. "I don't care, Dan."

Dan gasped. "And you called me Dan, Nat!"

Natalie grabbed a kitchen knife and held it over his throat. "_Don't _call me _Nat."_

"Ughh, fine. Some things never change."

Amy watched the siblings with interest.

* * *

Ian crept up on Amy. "So, little Prince Daniel and Princess Natalie, who are the romantics now?"

Natalie blushed the second time that day. "Ian, _shut up."_

"I guess you gave each other pet names."

_"Shut up."_

"And you're dating."

"Ewww!" yelled Dan.

Natalie just smiled a kind smile at Ian. "Oh, brother dear, I thought it was you and Amy."

Ian forced a smile. "No."

"Let's see...Iamy?" wondered Natalie.

"No, it's AMIAN," suggested Dan.

Amy blushed, picking up a magazine.

"You're leaving me to them?" Ian whispered in her ear.

Amy grinned. "Have fun, Kabra. Karma is going you bite your bum, just like Buffy."

* * *

**I'm so sorry that I haven't updated! Sorry! D:**


	12. Chainsaw

**Disclaimer: I don't own 39 Clues.**

**JesseCPK: I would never make them watch Twilight! :O**

**fieryjunior35: LOL, yeah.  
**

**Mads-hatter-15: They'll get married on chapter 30, sorry. Chapter 15 is where they start dating.**

**Volcanic Lily: They're cute! But deadly...like me! XDDDDD**

**TheTranquilTornado: I know. :)  
**

**jamyfrver: You ROFLed on this chapter?**

**The-worlds-bookfreak: Thanks! :)**

**Paris Cahill: Thank you!**

* * *

Amy looked into the magazine she picked up. 'Dangerous Stunts' it said. While she read, she heard the conversation...

"Loooove is deadly."

"Shut up."

"Oppa Gangnam Style!"

"EDWARD!"

"What the bleep?"

"YOU STOLE HIM FROM ME!"

Silence. Amy looked up to see Dan glaring at Natalie.

"Are you gay?"

"Nope, I was pretending to be Bella."

"That was...horrible, Daniel."

"You're welcome, Nat-san."

* * *

"I got Just Dance," said Amy. "Anyone want to play?"

"ME! Ninja's can dance the Chainsaw Dance."

"You cutting your head off with a chainsaw over and over? Hilarious!" mused Natalie.

"No! It's...this!"

Dan danced like he was limping.

"Daniel, that should be called 'Zombie Break Dance.'" said Ian.

"Haha, and I'm one of those guys from Sexy and I Know It."

"I see the resemblance clearly," replied Natalie, looking him over.

Ian snickered.

"ROUND 1...FIGHT!"

"Amy, you didn't tell me this was boxing! I'm not good at boxing on the Wii!"

"The Wee?" asked Ian.

"You call yourself a ninja?" demanded Natalie.

"Too late."

Dan groaned. "The _Wii, _Ian, _not _the Wee."

Amy and Natalie burst out laughing.


	13. Grey?

**Disclaimer: I don't own 39 Clues.**

**Mads-hatter-15: The conversation turns weird...**

**JesseCPK: Everyone was attracted by the word chainsaw...**

**The-worlds-bookfreak: I hope she stares at you with a blank look on her face. :)**

**Volcanic Lily: I'm not good at dancing. At all. XDDD  
**

**Nova Mirage: The Chainsaw Dance is not a real thing, sadly.  
**

**readinfreak3546: That /is/ a good idea. I'll do that while they're dating!  
**

**Guest: I am now, and thanks!**

**BlueBeltNinja: O_O Ask my friends on here, they'll know the answer to that horrid question. XDDD Anyways, this is before The Cahills vs Vespers, you know, or else they'd all be in action, and Natalie would be gone-disappeared, I mean.**

* * *

"Okay, Fifty Shades of WHAT?!" exclaimed Dan.

"Gray, Dan, gray," reminded Natalie.

"Who's gay?"

Natalie slapped her hand on her forehead. "I said _gray, _you git."

"But it's spelled _grey."_

"There are two ways to spell it, dork."

"You talk to Amy too much now," groaned Dan. "Hang out with me. It's better than gossiping about books all day."

"Hey!" an outraged Natalie replied. "Percy is so hot!"

Dan groaned. "You are under a water spell, which-"

"Can only be freed by a kiss of a git."

"Hilarious, Nat. I think Jonah volunteered. Ooh, I've got another vote."

"From who?"

"Your mom."

"Dan!" she exclaimed.

"She is an idiot!"

"More like a sadist, crazy witch."

"I've never heard you speak such words of yourself!" gasped Dan.

"DAAAN!" Natalie yelled.

"What?"

"Fifty Shades of Gray."

"What about it?"

"It sucks. Amy even threw up reading the Wiki summary."

"AMY USED A LAPTOP?!"

"Yes..."

"You're kidding."

"No...sorry, Dan."

"No...this is GREAT!"

"Okay," muttered Natalie.

"That boy is staring at you," said Dan, pointing at a handsome looking boy. Natalie swore, and saw a glimmer of hate in Dan's eyes.

He was still staring at the boy. Natalie groaned.


	14. Furious

**Disclaimer: I don't own 39 Clues.**

* * *

**It's been a long while, fellow readers. I have to thank you all for generously reviewing for this, and I'll try and quickly pick it up again. Expect daily updates, and if I don't, then review by slapping me. Hard. XD**

**Sooo...here we go!**

* * *

"So...you're actually going on a DATE with somebody random guy you saw, but I've known you for years?!"

"What's that supposed to mean, Dan? Are you jealous, perhaps?"

"No. It was an example."

"Good. Then you won't mind me wearing a miniskirt for him."

Dan gritted his teeth.

"What if he's some old man who got creamy stuff all over his face to lure little girls into his house?"

"Now you're being ridiculous, Dan. He's my age. And I'm _not _little!"

"I doubt it. I bet he stalks girls and shouts, 'I have candy!'"

"That's just old. Besides, I've got my poisons with me."

"Poison his food in my honor."

"But you have no honor."

"That burns, Natty."

"_Natalie, _not Nat, not Cat, not Natty, just-"

"I know, I know. But..."

"What now?"

"I'm worried about you..."

Natalie stared at him, then burst out laughing. "S-seriously? Dan...you're _worried_? I'm a trained Lucian, remember?"

"Don't let him get under your miniskirt."

"I'll save it for you, then."

Dan blushed. "No, not like that! Gross!" He scurried away from the girl.

Natalie smirked. "I'll have fun with this Tomas, she mumbled.

* * *

"Natalie's going on a date."

Amy spilled her tea over herself. "What?! With Dan? FINALLY! Natan...I ship it."

Ian rolled his eyes. "No, with some Tomas on the streets. Dan's jealous, though."

"Ooh, the tension."

"Is that all you can think about, Amy? The love triangle?"

"Yeah. I bet my money on that Tomas boy. No offense to Dan. Natalie prefers _hawt _guys, not cute ones."

"_Hawt?" _mimicked Ian, snickering.

"That's not funny."

"Okay...I ship it too."

"What?"

"Natan."

"Oh...so you don't ship Amian?"

"Are you even _allowed _to ship your own pairing?"

"Yeah...I'm sure Natalie ships Natan, Ian...Jeez."

"Blackmail!"

_...two minutes later..._

"SO DO THE HARLEM SHAKE!"

"NANANANANANANA!"

_...after that..._

Amy sobbed, eating chocolate ice cream out of the box. "JAMY IS COMING TRUE IN THE 39 CLUES SERIES."

"Can't you control your future self?"

"No...I don't want to be with him!" Amy shoved more chocolate ice cream in her mouth. "Ian...I need to tie up those authors..."

Ian smirked. "So you like me instead of the dude in your future?"

"N-no...I didn't say that!"

"Yes you did, basically."

"When?"

"Now. But you're denying your feelings."

"What ones? Mutual dislike?"

"Yeah," Ian said sarcastically, "That feeling. No! What do you think, Amy?"

"Hate?"

"Half of it, I guess. It's your pet name..."

"Bookworm? But that doesn't make sense."

Ian face-palmed. "You're supposed to be smart..."

"I am smart!" Amy replied indignantly. "Stop using riddles!"

Ian rolled his eyes. "Maybe some other time."

* * *

**Chapter fourteen is finished! XD**

**-Gone**


	15. Acting

**Disclaimer: I don't own 39 Clues.**

* * *

**I'm keeping my promise, guys, I swear. I was out today, though...**

**This chapter is to gush all about Natan on Dan's side is.**

* * *

__"He's _such _an amazing cook, Dan."

"Maybe it was his mother cooking? Maybe he's a _liar?_"

"I'm a Lucian, I'd know when a Tomas lies."

"Are you _sure _he doesn't have Lucian blood?"

"Yes, are you doubting my skill?"

"Maybe a little."

Natalie sighed, "Dan, seriously. Why are you acting so cranky?"

"You rubbed off on me."

"Ha ha. Very funny."

"And I rubbed off on you."

"That just sounds weird."

Dan laughed, "Maybe it was supposed to."

"And oh...his _skin. _It was so soft!"

"Are you sure it wasn't cream you were feeling?"

"AND I'M DATING HIM!"

Dan faints.

* * *

"Amy, when you go to the store, buy me some baby lotion."

"Why?"

"Prank," Dan lied.

"Um...okay?"

* * *

"Nellie...teach me how to COOK. PLEASE!" Dan was currently on his knees, begging for cooking lessons.

Nellie raised an eyebrow. "Dan...are you okay?"

"Yeah...I'm totally fine...Tota- ALERT! ALERT!"

Dan fell to the floor, and rolled under the table ninja-style as Natalie and her boyfriend walked in.

"Who's he?"

"He's my distant cousin..."

"At least you say distant," muttered Dan, glaring at her boyfriend testily, as her boyfriend glared back.

"Come on, _darling_, let's go watch that movie you wanted to see."

"I'd rather see Ninja today. Dan, you want to join us?"

Dan smiled a bit, knowing Natalie suggested his favorite movie. But, he had other things to do. Important things. "No, maybe another day."

Natalie's boyfriend sighed in relief, steering her away before she could beg him to watch it.

* * *

"Ian...will you do me a favor?"

"What? I'm busy."

"Will you help me prank Natalie's boyfriend?"

Ian smirked. "Sure."

* * *

**More drama than humor, but if you found it funny...um, good for you? XD**


End file.
